My "Witched" Witch

I realized today why we have all been so sad this week. Halloween was your favorite holiday, of course. I think I was just wanting to get through it again this year. But another "upside the head" moment from you made me realize I should enjoy it, for your sake. Usually it is a crazy day at school that leaves us exhausted, but feeling good. Today was no exception. The children were great and so cute in their costumes! We had fall centers and they were well organized and run smoothly by wonderful, amazing parents, many of whom dressed up themselves. Adorable!
Chana got Charlie Brown T-shirts for us to wear as our costumes, so I felt Grandma Judy with me before school even began. And of course I heard her CCR "Bad Moon Arising" on the way to school. And then, bam, a Kennasent moment! Sitting right in the middle of the floor was a little Strawberry Shortcake girl! And then another... Next to them, a Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtle. And then, a Superman! So all three of you were represented in what seems to be a resurgence of those characters. So I just let it be.
Thanks for showing me that it can still be a memorable day. I will celebrate (and maybe even decorate) next year in your honor, my little "witched witch".. Happy Halloween, wherever you are, dressing up all the cats we've been sending into your care, whether they want it or not.

She

When I first heard this song by Elvis Costello in the movie "Notting Hill", I remembered all of the words immediately. I knew I had heard it before by someone else. Then I remembered it was from a record my mom played in the 60's by a French artist named Charles Aznavour. It turns out he wrote the beautiful lyrics. I chose this song for your celebration because it always reminded me of you...and every day, even more so.

She 
May be the face I can't forget 
The trace of pleasure or regret 
May be my treasure or the price I have to pay 
She 
May be the song that summer sings 
May be the chill that autumn brings 
May be a hundred different things 
Within the measure of a day

She 
May be the beauty or the beast 
May be the famine or the feast 
May turn each day into a heaven or a hell 
She may be the mirror of my dreams 
The smile reflected in a stream 
She may not be what she may seem 
Inside her shell 

She 
Who always seems so happy in a crowd 
Whose eyes can be so private and so proud 
No one's allowed to see them when they cry 
She 
May be the love that cannot hope to last 
May come to me from shadows of the past 
That I'll remember till the day I die 

She 
May be the reason I survive 
The why and wherefore I'm alive 
The one I'll care for through the rough in ready years 
Me 
I'll take her laughter and her tears 
And make them all my souvenirs 
For where she goes I've got to be 
The meaning of my life is 

She
She, oh she

Charles Aznavour in English
Charles Aznavour in French

Elvis Costello's version

Best Friends!

Today is Alisa's birthday. I found this picture of the two of you on her site. I wasn't expecting to find it and had never seen it before, so it knocked me for a loop. How many other pictures of you are out there that I will never see unless I stumble upon them? That's the tooth-gapped grin I picture without hesitation. How sweet, innocent and happy you both were. Best friends! Happy Birthday, Alisa!

Don't Sing of Death When You Ain't Been There

Such a overly played song, such a popular tune, such provocative lyrics... and I want to scream at the young woman singing them! So here they are (short version), followed by my revision...

"If I Die Young"
If I die young, bury me in satin
Lay me down on a bed of roses
Sink me in the river, at dawn
Send me away with the words of a love song,
Uh oh, uh oh.
Lord make me a rainbow, I'll shine down on my mother
She'll know I'm safe with you when she stands under my colors, oh and
Life ain't always what you think it ought to be, no
Ain't even grey, but she buries her baby
The sharp knife of a short life, well
I've had just enough time...
-----------------------------------------------------------------
My Turn
Don't sing of death
laying down in roses
with a voice never touched by pain.
Please don't ask me to listen to your story of the rainbow
when you haven't seen the rain.
Don't sing about dying when death hasn't yet come
ask it only of your loved ones when your day is truly done.
Oh no, oh no...
I listened to her tears,
I felt her aching pain
I knew her broken spirit
like the rainbow knows the rain.
We read her letters
that she took the time to pen,
knowing it would be the last of her words
we would ever hear again.
We honored her wishes
when we scattered her ashes
near the old tree overlooking the lake
where she longed to be for eternity.
Her final resting place,
not asked for in a song
before her life was over,
only after she was gone.
So don't ask to lay in a bed of roses
when you don't have the right,
If no one's listening,
yell, scream, and holler
don't wait until you're gone
because the words won't matter...
No one has just enough time....
Oh no, oh no.

Bambi Lynn Rake Tidwell

Unplugged

When Kenton was born and you were the first to hold him, you said it was the only time in your life that you laughed and cried at the same time. (You were 5!) Now I find myself doing the same. When friends remind me of something you did or said, I laugh, then I cry. When I am alone, I cry then I remember your antics, then I laugh. I keep finding what I call Tidbits of you everywhere. The latest? Your "Fire List" for your little 2 room cabin in June Lake. You always had your priorities... And so it goes...Laughing and crying....As my Grandma and Grandpa would have said, "God love her!"

Waltzing with Kenna

Yesterday I went out to water the yard and there was a white butterfly, fluttering slowly about the grounds. I followed for several minutes and then just stood in the driveway, warmed by the sun, watching the beautiful white wings disappear over the fence, happy to have waltzed with you if even for a moment. When you were gone, I turned around and Kenton was standing in the walkway. "Did you see her?" I asked him. "Yes" he said with a smile just for you and me.


Butterfly Waltz - Piano

Another version - Beautiful Violin!

The Way You Look Tonight

You heard him on the radio and said you liked his voice. Then you saw how cute he was so I planned to take you to the Michael Buble' concert. I hoped he would sing "The Way You Look Tonight". At Kameron and KC's wedding, I found myself singing it in my head while you were getting ready. Now I sing it in my heart when I look at the picture that you actually posed for and let me take! You made the stanza "Lovely... never, ever change" real, but not in the way I imagined. And we didn't make the concert, did we? I'm sorry.

Some day, when I’m awfully low,
When the world is cold,
I will feel a glow just thinking of you
And the way you look tonight.

You’re lovely, with your smile so warm
And your cheeks so soft,
There is nothing for me but to love you,
And the way you look tonight.

With each word your tenderness grows,
Tearing my fear apart...
And that laugh that wrinkles your nose,
It touches my foolish heart.

Lovely ... never, ever change.
Keep that breathless charm.
Won’t you please arrange it?
’cause I love you ... just the way you look tonight.

With each word your tenderness grows,
Tearing my fear apart...
And that laugh that wrinkles your nose,
It touches my foolish heart.

Lovely ... never, ever change.
Keep that breathless charm.
Won’t you please arrange it?
’cause I love you ... just the way you look tonight.